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What is an extant woman?

ex·tant

[ek-stuh nt, ik-stant]

–adjective

1. in existence; still existing; not destroyed or lost.

2. Archaic. Standing out; protruding.

Fighting to be alive. The last step before becoming extinct. I came to a place in my life when I truly believed I would be destroyed by my depression and harmful behavior. My life experiences haunted me to the point of destruction.

But God.

God helped me recognize that even though, at times, I feel that I am not all that I want to be, I am still in existence. By His grace, I have not been destroyed or lost. There are days that I feel lost…..very lost, but in reality, I am not lost at all. I cannot just accept my challenges and struggles as “normal.” With God’s help, I can make a change. I can find resolve with these issues that have followed me for years. So this is my journey. It may be difficult at times. It may be dark. I feel sure that it will be comical quite often because life happens and sometimes you just have to laugh. I have no doubt that there will be happy days and triumph on occasion. I am not going to promise that it will always be exciting or bright, but the one thing that I promise myself is that it will be…… real. I will commit to transparent authenticity with my thoughts and my struggles. I firmly believe the truth will set you free. I am still existing. I am not destroyed or lost. I am an extant woman.

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. bendedspoon
    Jul 15, 2010 @ 23:57:50

    I can relate on how you’re feeling and it’s really so hard until freedom day. Freedom is neither all laughing and jumping but knowing that you have a choice and making that choice without heaviness on the heart. Choice such as choosing to laugh and jump? Yessss! 🙂

    Reply

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